Facebook Status of the Day

So, I come to find out today that a few people who read my blog aren't on Facebook. Gasp! Who are these aliens, and what do they want from me? But seriously, they didn't quite get the concept of the "Facebook Status of the Day" blog posts. They thought the sentiments expressed within those posts were mine, and wondered why I didn't like "Entourage." Cute, right? Sooo, for the uninitiated, let's recap: The Facebook Status of the Day blog post recognizes the funny status updates of my friends (or friends of friends, as I occasionally get reader contributions emailed to me) from that day. To paraphrase our favorite news outlets: All opinions expressed in "Facebook Status of the Day" are solely the respective Facebookers' opinions and do not (necessarily) reflect the opinions of the author of this blog.

Now that we've dispensed with the formalities, let's move on to the funny stuff. Today was actually a HOT status day. Well played, friends. I had to really work to narrow down the field.

Facebook Status of the Day:

• So I watched "Dog the Bounty Hunter" last night. At the end of the show they said email them TIPS. I emailed this...I couldn't resist!! "Here’s a tip, I was watching your show for the first time, and after 2 glasses of water I realized your hair was making me thirsty. Damn. It’s called conditioner. Seriously."

Runners Up:

• I would totally fight a nun for an eggplant sandwich right now.

• RP wonders why another doctor would send a patient to me to be evaluated for headaches, considering I am a GYNECOLOGIST?!?! I don't care if they are "hormonal," what would you like me to do?
  Comment: I know a number of people I would consider sending to a proctologist to help dislodge their heads.

• HF thinks the phrase "Daddy, I'm going to fill this glass all the way up with milk, so I can be strong for tomorrow," actually means "as soon as you walk away, I am going to pour a pint of milk all over the kitchen."